The Bitch Fix
Six steps to rewire your body from hormone hell to hormone harmony.
Get your mood, energy, and mojo back!
I'm just going to cut right to it. This is your life. Your one "wild and precious life." Let's not screw around! You were born for more than this. You show up as more than this every.single.day. You shake out the cape, square your shoulders, and bravely open the door to each day with courage and tenacity, taking charge of your home, career, and super-busy, super-charged life. You hit it like a boss. Only . . .
. . . only maybe you also hit a freaking wall every day. Or every month. Or every hour.
. . . maybe you are bone damn tired by 8 pm.
. . . maybe you feel kinda "psycho" around period time, and are ready to run away to Tahiti at least monthly if not daily.
. . . maybe you are snapping at the kids and the hubby in ways that kinda shock you but also you feel totally unable to stop.
. . . maybe you have been slowly putting on weight a pound here and a pound there and can't seem to slow the momentum.
. . . maybe everyone at the office thinks you totally have your sh*t together, but secretly you often lose track of what you were supposed to be doing in a kind of brain-foggy haze.
. . . maybe your monthly cycle is all jacked up. Super heavy, super painful, unpredicable, or lasting more than 5 days every month.
. . . maybe you just don't have that girl-on-fire, run-headlong-into-life feeling you had 5 or 10 years ago.
And MAYBE . . . you aren't telling anyone any of this. Or maybe you tried to tell your doctor, but in the 7 minutes in the office, all she had time for was a quick prescription for the Pill or an anti-depressant, even though you know deep down in your heart that that's not all there is to it. Maybe you've been led to believe it's "all in your head."
Your symptoms are real, and they are practically screaming at you that you need to do something differently!
Are you finally ready to listen? To take back your mood, energy, and mojo and live the badass life you were designed for? Fan-freaking-tastic. Keep reading. If not, that's cool. You can close this window and mosey on over to the rest of the interwebs. We'll always be here for you if you need a hand :)
- Diane Mariechild
Listen, I've been JUST where you are. Dog tired, wiring myself on coffee to wake up and wine to wind down. Weird periods, weird energy coming out at the kids, feeling like I was clinging to a cliff by my fingernails. It wasn't pretty. But I was determined not to let it be permanent! Being in the fire burns, but it's also the perfect place from which to transform.
I call this place being "in the mush." The picture I pull up about being in the mush is what happens to a caterpillar when it closes itself into a chrysalis. The caterpillar doesn't know what's happening, but it draws on its internal wisdom, closes the curtains on life as it knows it, and dissolves essentially into mush that then, somehow, reorganizes into a butterfly. When you're in the mush, you don't know FOR SURE what's going to happen, but you know that you can't stay stuck any longer. You're ready to transform.
Transformation is what I'm all about. I'm not here for half-assed results, and you shouldn't be either. So what does transformation look like? Here are some specifics of what you can expect in The Bitch Fix program:
Finally being seen and heard. I will hear you in our private 1:1 sessions, and I promise to take the time to truly LISTEN. Your sisters in the program will also listen. Through our private group, you will connect with and be able to rest into the circle of other women who are also ready to transform into the clear, energized women they are meant to be.
Finding out what's ACTUALLY going on in there. For many of us, our bodies are essentially a mystery. We have a general idea of some things that happen every month, but why they do and if it's "normal" or just "common" is a black box. We put in some foods and maybe some supplements. Add a teaspoon or a truckload of mindset and inner dialogue. Follow the latest fad from Insta (celery juice anyone? Detox powder? Steam your hoo-ha? Sprinkle on superfood fairy dust?) Put it all in the test tube with stress and to-do lists and see what happens. Are you doing the right things? Does the beaker boil over? How the hell are you supposed to know if any of this is working? What does working even look like?? Girlfriend, it's time to stop playing mad scientist. Learn what's happening and why in your weekly LIVE video lessons. Ask questions. Get answers. Get access to the exact functional labs I use in my practice to assess function of your thyroid, adrenal glads (stress managers) and, where needed, digestion. Also get access to my brain and experience in de-coding what theses labs are telling us!
Taking inspired action. I'll be with you every step of the way, and so will your sisters. Armed with your new-found knowledge, lab results, and my precise roadmap, you'll be ready to take to the steps you need to to start feeling better QUICKLY, while also having the breathing room to lock in change and super-charge your results.
Finally finding out what foods and supplements work for YOU. While we'll be working from a common framework, you'll also get the tools and personalized perspective to make this work just as your particular body requires. Every woman is unique, and while the framework will put you on the right path, you'll also be guided to your personalized path for success.
Well hey there! So nice to meet you, and so glad you found me. I'm Christine MacCarroll, and I'm a functional nutritionist, Board Certified in Holistic Nutrition, and specializing in women's health.
I didn't get here by accident. After a battle that began 7 years ago to recover my daughter's health, I became a woman on a mission. I was kinda hair-on-fire in those days . . . which was a great motivator, helped me heal my daughter, and led to a drastic 180 in my career . . . and ultimately also led to my own burnout.
After burning the candle at both ends while trying to find a solution for my daughter, working full time, taking her to therapy several times a week, then quickly moving into a new career and starting a brand new business . . . well, to say I tanked might be an understatement.
Luckily, what I had been learning on my way to tanking is ultimately what enabled me to get my health back. I knew enough to know the signs and symptoms, and to know that my exhaustion, brain fog, moodiness, and return of terrible cramps were NOT NORMAL. I started putting the pieces together, testing, addressing, retesting, and moving on until I felt like myself again. And it's my joy and pleasure now to help other women do the exact same thing!
Christine is simply amazing and I'm so grateful to have had the privilege to learn from her. She is a treasure trove of knowledge and communicates information in an easy to understand way. I appreciate her holistic approach looking at the entire picture of health and not just one thing. In her Bitch Fix hormone class I thought I would learn about hormones...which I did (and wow are our bodies incredible!!) but I learned so much more about mindfulness, 101 in digestion, manifesting the future I want, supplements and more! She changed my life for the better and I look forward to continue learning from her. There is no doubt in my mind that you will love her and learn so much from her.
As if all that wasn't kick-ass enough for you, you've got access to some bitchin' bonuses. The bonuses alone kinda make this a no-brainer!
I get it. You know there's no magic pill, and that you can't just change your health, happiness, and hormones through osmosis or wishful thinking. Change will take some time and focus. At the same time, you're ready to feel better LIKE YESTERDAY. You're ready to jump right in to make the most of your program. That's where the 21-Day Bitch Fix Boot Camp comes in.
We get down 'n dirty right away to jump start your results and start making noticeable strides in just 21 days that you can then build on during the course of the program. Impatient types, I've got you :)
Can't you just hear John Denver crooning? "Mountain mama . . . Take me home, country roads . . . "
I can. And home can mean so many things. For me, for this retreat, home is home to ourselves, home to our own hearts and feminine wisdom, home to the inner voice of peace and relaxtion. Let's chill, shall we?
The Mountain Mama retreat was maybe my very favorite part of the last Bitch Fix program.
Includes daily morning and evening circles, guided meditation class and practice, a hands-on herbal class and take-home healing tea, a cooking class, and all your gluten-free, dairy-free, mostly organic meals.
In addition to planned activities, there will be plenty to do on your own: rest onsite at our beautiful property; read or journal with your sacred solo time; take a nature hike in the surrounding woods; head to the local spa to soak in hot tubs or treat yourself to a massage or facial.
This wasn't just a "eat this" type of course. It was really about your whole wellness and shifting ideas around food. I needed this so badly. After struggling for what feels like forever to eat well and bombarding myself with information, Christine's approach of FINDING WHAT WORKS FOR YOUR BODY felt so simple, yet profound. It used to feel like a punishment to eat healthy - something I had to do but didn't really enjoy all the time. I'm so happy to be thinking of things with excitement towards how well I can nourish myself, instead. She is amazingly knowledgeable and really wants to help people heal. I wish I'd found her a long, long time ago.